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A letter in Gil's bag

Dear Gil,

I'm tucking this into your clothes, so that when you go to get stuff out on the tour you'll discover this and think about me and how much I'm missing you. It's funny, as I'm writing this, you're sleeping right there but I'm already missing you just thinking about you going. I need to be here, you need to be there. That's just the way it is, but it doesn't make it easier. We can't say that enough, to ourself and each other, can we? I know, I know...

So I'm going to be concentrating on getting the apartment fixed up, so the lamps won't be all lonely. They need other furniture to blend in with. And we need dishes to make dinners on, and drapes for the windows, and a real bed and sheets. Maybe a bathmat and a shower curtain for the bathroom with fishes on them, or some other classic bathroom motifs. It'll be just like a home. Your home. Our home.

This doesn't feel like the end of anything. As much as I'm going to miss you, it doesn't even feel like the end of our time together - it's like a pause, maybe between the chapters of our stories there's a long line break and this is it. You know stuff happens in between, but it's not what you think about it - it's just waiting for the story to pick up again. Maybe I'm not making much sense because it's the middle of the night, but I wanted you to have something to read and hold in your hands, something to keep with you.

When I was a little girl, I used to dream about my future boyfriend like all girls do. I used to imagine all these things about him - what kind of car he'd drive, what he'd wear, what we'd wear to our wedding. But I never could imagine the boy clearly- couldn't focus on it. Now every dream of the future has your face, speaks in your voice. I just thought you should know.

I love you more than anything. I've come to realize that I'm not staying behind because of school, or because of my family obligations, or my job. Not that, none of that matters so much anymore... I'm staying behind for you. So you have a place that's separate from all the madness of this sudden fame, so you have a place to come back to, a place that will keep you grounded. So you've got your home. It's all for you.


Dear Diary

I'm really happy with how things have been going lately. Gil is just the sweetest boy ever!

I love helping him sort through his records, or just sitting and talking to him. And how he calls me 'sneaky chick' is just so adorable. Like I snuck up on him, or something. Aww!

Classes are going okay too, though the stubborn horse is a bit of a problem. She's really giving our husbandry studies lab group a hard time. I hope she calms down after she starts feeling better. Poor Muffin.

Calm before the Hellmouth...

So things are going well lately...

The IndiaM project went off without a hitch, and she's living at the Last Resort with Mr. Bothwell and the rest of the Last. Warren's been working on some interesting projects lately.

Everything's been gearing up towards some sort of big impending disaster with the Djinn. The Last have been very quiet... and I'm not sure if we're staying around to help with that, or getting out of town.

Maggie and her boyfriend Michael seem to be doing well. He's a very personable young man, and Jon went to highschool with him, so he comes recommended. Ma, Pa , Chris and Joey are pretty happy with him considering he saved their lives from Drusilla (this crazy vampire who's Spike's sire). Saving your butt is a desirable quality in a daughter's boyfriend.

Hm... I wonder if this means they like Michael better than they like Warren? Well, shoot...
Looks like the Bothwell project is just about finished....

Then it'll be time for whatever spellwork he's going to try to put the ghost in the machine, so to speak.

I'm rather nervous about the whole business still, really. I wonder if she'll count as being alive... or undead?

Kind of makes you wonder, you know?

Kind of how I wonder if Buffybot and Rebecca are... well, I'm guessing that they're alive, if not in the same way we are, you know? They've definitely got feelings, and thoughts, and emotions. So I guess that's what makes you alive.

Maggie's performing in another dinner theater show next week- called "Hell of a Time To Die" . She's given me some extra tickets to pass out, because they're doing a free show in the park one night. I tried to tell her how dangerous it is to do anything in the park, but there's a whole troupe of actors in a well lit area, so I guess it'll be okay. Still, I'd feel better if we can be there. Maybe I can convince some of the Last to go along with us.

Look out, Andrew

Well, looks like I might have to kick Andrew but not for the reasons I imagined. The Greg boy never called Maggie back, and apparently has another girlfriend now. So she's all mopey about having missed her opportunity to go out on a date and such. I'm really feeling bad for her--- though I'm really quite relieved that she won't actually be going out with him. He didn't seem like the kind of boy I'd want my sister dating, you know? He had a history as a street kid, which doesn't generally make for a well mannered behaved sort of boy.

So I think things worked out for the best. Now I just have to figure out some way to cheer Maggie up. Maybe ice cream. That usually works when I'm feeling down, after all. Of course, as Maggie points out, I've got a boyfriend and a happy relationship. Even though my boyfriend is (as she puts it) "Mr. Science Geek." Hmph. I love Warren's scientific mind. And the rest of him, too.


Andrew called and had me bring my sister over to the house so she could meet this friend of his.. .Greg, his name is.. who's a new member of the Last. Well, he seems pretty punk and dangerous to me, so I'm not too sure I'd like him dating my sister. Sure, Maggie's 16 and he's right around the same age, so it's not a big deal that way.. .but if he breaks her heart, I'm so going to kick Andrew in the danglies.

They seemed to get along well enough... but I don't know. I'm not sure he's good enough for my sister. Jonathan said I was just being overprotective, and that they wouldn't let anyone into the Last unless they were you know... decent. I asked him to explain Bambi, then. That was pretty much the end of that conversation. Well, maybe I am being just a little protective... but she's a sweet girl and hasn't had a boyfriend before, so she won't know all the sleazy male tricks to look out for. Not that I have all that much experience with these things myself, but still. It's my duty as a big sister to look out for her.

A bit of excitement...

So there's some big thing going on over at the Last Resort, with Margaret in jail and all that. Warren says that someone tried to frame he. He, Becca, and Jon went over there to help out. Warren wanted me to stay here at the house, just in case it was something bad... which is nice to have a boyfriend who worries about you and all that... but it was kind of lonely being at home all alone. There's only so many games of solitaire you can play before you feel kind of lonely.

But everyone's back now, and apparently, the end result of everything is that Margaret's in jail while they try and get her name cleared, because they can't exactly admit to how they know she was framed. Poor girl. I hope she gets out of there soon. I know I'd completely freak if I was stuck in jail...

Oh, and because I mentioned I was lonely while he was gone, Warren spent the whole day with me playing games and snuggling and watching movies and such. Isn't he just the sweetest?

Life on the Hellmouth

We got the call from Kit Bothwell yesterday that he'd made contact with the spirit, so we can go ahead with the building plans. I was still a bit nervous about the whole thing- but Warren pointed out that it would just be a ghost in the machine, so to speak.. not an actual resurrection. And after all, wasn't making AI a form of creation anyhow? And if resurrection is something we humans shouldn't be doing... maybe so is creation, and that turned out well enough.

So yeah... I'm feeling a bit better about things, but still cautious. After all, we do live on a Hellmouth.. and from what I've been learning that's not exactly a good place to be messing around with forces of life and death.

Other than that, things have been good. The Buffybot is going about and doing patrols, and hasn't suffered any irreparable damage- so all's well on that front. Tamara and Spike's wedding was lovely...the food was great, and Warren and I got to dance and everything. Jonathan and Andrew got into a little spat that ended in cake throwing, but that's pretty normal for them when they hang out, I've found. They were friends again (though covered in cake) five minutes later.

Classes are stating up again soon at college, and I'm hoping that I can balance work, social life, and classwork. Warren says he'll help me with classes if I need it, so I suppose things will be fine. My mother called and reminded me that I haven't been coming home to visit lately. I think I'll drop by there this weekend- maybe see if Warren wants to come with me and do the meet the parents thing. That's a big step, I know.. but I think they'll like him.

Resurrecting the Dead?

This fellow named Kit Bothwell came over the other night, and wanted Warren to raise the dead. It was very disturbing. Warren explained that his Buffybot wasn't operating using the actual spirit or memories of the previous Slayer, Buffy Summers- she was just programmed to be a reasonable facsimilty. Mr. Bothwell asked if it would be possible to harness a spirit into a robotic body, and they talked about it for a while. Apparently, Mr. Bothwell was once the Watcher of a Slayer named India Cohen, and he's considering whether or not robotics would be able to 'bring her back to life'. How creepy is that?

I tried to tell Warren I didn't think it was all that good of an idea, bringing a spirit back from the afterlife (whatever that may be like) and putting it into a robotic body. Warren said he wasn't even sure that Bothwell would be able to contact the spirit (he'd said he'd been trying and failing for quite some time), so it was better to just 'cross that bridge when we come to it.'

Sometimes I'm a bit disturbed by Warren's moral ambiguity.


Well, Meerkat Inc. (Warren, me, Jonathan and Rebecca) went to this sci-fi convention to sell the light saber swords (and also, some cheaper plastic only models). The swords weren't doing so hot until the live demonstration of their sharpness that involved Becca cutting through a watermelon like it was butter. Of course, this is because she's a robot and has amazing strength... but most of the people who bought the swords didn't look like they got much more exercise than lifting their television remote, so I suppose it's alright.

It was really nice to see Warren so happy and all proud of his design doing so well. Tamara called the other day to let him know that the new crossbow was working great on patrols, and to thank him again for it. We're working on some other weaponry, too - as well as testing the capacities of the latest 'bot. She's remarkable- even stronger and faster than Rebecca (though not nearly as bright). I wonder if that's a holdover from who she's modeled after? I'll have to ask Warren on that one. Soon, it should be time to field test her- I can hardly wait.